|
|
The
Secure Child: Helping Children Feel Safe and Confident in a
Changing World
by
Stanley I Greenspan, MD
|
pdf >>
Review
by Paul Jay Fink, MD
Cambridge
(MA): Perseus Publishing; 2002. ISBN: 0738207500 160 pages;
$20.00
|
The
Secure Child is an outstanding book for
parents and professionals alike. Although short and easy to read,
the book is full of good information and techniques for handling children
from birth through adolescence.
The
concepts and ideas that Dr Greenspan presents are the result of 30
years of in-depth study of children and their families. The author
has chosen to focus his parenting book on the issue of security--a
goal made clear by the book's subtitle--to help our children feel
safe and confident in an insecure world. This book was published after
the sad and terrible events of September 11, 2001 and refers to them
expressly once or twice to help us keep that goal--a sense of security--directly
before us.
This
book is divided into three major sections: infancy and early childhood;
the grade school years; and adolescence. The same themes and techniques
are described as they apply to each group, and advice is given in
an upbeat, positive, "you-can-do-this" way. The basic needs
of children--love, warmth, patience, communication, and listening--are
themes interwoven through the book, which is neither preachy nor overinstructive.
The Secure Child is a friendly guide containing practical ideas
that can be implemented by parents or other caretakers who truly wish
to give children the ingredients necessary for growing into competent
adults who feel safe and have good self-esteem.
Each
section of the book is divided into three sections. Without jargon
and in a way that allows readers to apply the information to themselves
and to their children, the first section of the book describes normal
child development. The second section discusses signs of distress
and insecurity commonly seen in specific age groups (for example,
the chapter on infancy and early childhood discusses "excessive
sadness" and "aggression and excessive risk-taking").
The third section--which discusses ways to help children strengthen
their sense of security--is particularly powerful because it describes
five issues that trouble many parents on a daily basis: 1) how to
create "floor time," the special time reserved for the child
every day; 2) how to develop and maintain shared communication; 3)
how to adapt each child's floor time to that child's own personality
profile; 4) how to develop the parental skill of problem-solving (a
section that will resonate with every parent); and 5) methods of setting
appropriate limits for children. The problem-solving sections included
throughout the book can serve as ready reference for parents trying
to cope with specific areas of difficulty.
Woven
throughout the book is the concept of security being absolutely essential
for children's mental health as they grow to adulthood. Secure children
can learn, obey, think, and develop empathy. The Secure Child
is therefore also essential reading for practitioners in the mental
health and child care professions:
I wish
every parent could read this book; it is an important contribution
to the literature on parenting. I regret, however, that the book will
remain inaccessible to many parents who do not care and who deprive
their children of the important ingredients emphasized in this volume:
warmth, love, understanding, and empathy.
Stanley
Greenspan is one of the great developmentalists of our time. His body
of work shows that he is an extremely thoughtful and creative man
who tries to understand children and the parent/child dyad. Unlike
many other books on child development, The Secure Child is
not a book drawn from one author's own narcissistic ideas about children;
instead, the book is based on solid research and is written beautifully
so that the average parent can enjoy, understand, and use it.
Paul
Jay Fink, MD, is a Professor of Psychiatry at Temple University
School of Medicine; Chairman of the Youth Homicide Committee of the
Philadelphia Interdisciplinary Youth Fatality Review Team; a Past
President of the American Psychiatric Association; a consultant for
public health in the City of Philadelphia; and an expert in the areas
of child abuse and youth violence.
